Coffee Conundrum

Some of the most simplest things in life have an unfailing habit of becoming incredibly complex.

I have a Nespresso coffee machine that I bought several years ago when I was in Singapore but which has been languishing in storage ever since I came to the Philippines (nearly 2 years ago - my, doesn't time fly).  For those of you who don't know about Nespresso coffee I can thoroughly recommend it.  It's not the cheapest around but it is superb quality and there is a large variety of great tastes.

Just recently I had the remnants of my life in Singapore shipped over to the Philippines as it doesn't look like I'll be going back there to work for some time soon - if ever - and so I've been reunited with my Nespresso coffee machine.  I had a few old coffee capsules and stocked up on a couple more during a recent trip to Singapore.

However, my appetite for a caffeine fix soon depleted what stock I had so I had a look on-line to see if I could buy them in the Philippines.  I found one obscure place that was selling them for a third more than I could buy them for in Singapore but I thought I'd give them a try anyway.  I send off an enquiry and I received a reply asking me for my name, age, sex, address, inside leg measurement, etc.

What is it with the internet that every Tom, Dick or Harry seems to think that in exchange for their goods or services they can demand not only your hard earned cash but all your personal details.  I mean, what would you do if you walked into the local bakery (do they still exist?) and asked for a large sliced loaf and the person behind the counter, who you've never met in your whole life, started asking you for your address, name, age, telephone number and a password in order to buy said loaf?  Yes, I thought you would.  So why is the internet any different?  I hate it.

I replied to the Filipino company that I merely wanted to know where their shop/office/branch was so I could pop in and browse their selection of coffee at my leisure and buy whatever I wanted to (without being added to a huge database of personal information). This clearly then wasn't possible or was in breach of company policy as I haven't heard from them since.

So I decided to look further afield and, in exchange for my intimate details, I placed an order with Nespresso  who are based in Switzerland (of all places).  The website was quite clear in that they would ship the coffee but I was responsible for the duty and taxes and whilst they indicated what they might be, and whilst certainly not inconsiderate (up to 45%) it was certainly cheaper than buying locally here in the Philippines.

I placed an order that came to £67.40 and sat back and anxiously awaited delivery.  The consignment was sent via Fed Ex so I wouldn't have to suffer the vagarities of the Philippine Post.  As I checked my parcel on-line I saw that it only took 2 days to get from Switzerland to the Philippines despite going via Guang Zhou in China.  Then as I checked, and checked, and kept checking, it kept coming up with "In Transit - Clearance Delay", which was unsurprising considering the efficiency of the customs here.

Then, three weeks later I receive a letter from a third party stating that if I didn't claim my consignment that it would be "...forfeited in favor of the government..."  I called the contact number on the letter.  They said they would get someone to call me back.  A day or two later I had a call from a mobile phone (very odd) from someone claiming to be from Fed Ex and asking me to pay a disproportionate amount of money in duties and taxes.  As soon as I started to query this I was cut off.  I tried calling back to the same number but to no avail.

Around two days later I decided to call Fex Ex, or rather their agents in the Philippines.

Here's roughly how the conversation went:

"Hello Fex Ex, I have a query regarding a consignment of mine - the AWB No. is 123456789"

"Hold on, Sir, I'll trace the person who is dealing with your shipment . . . . ."

......... after around 15 minutes holding........

"Hello sir, can I help you"

"I hope so.  I'm querying my consignment that I haven't received yet"

"What's the AWB No.?"

"I just gave it to the person who answered the phone - it's 123456789"

"Ah, we've been calling you for 3 weeks about that shipment but no one will answer the phone"

"Errrrr, I find that very hard to believe because everyone else has been able to contact me"

"We also sent you a letter: didn't you get it?"

"I received a letter but from Cargo Haus"

"No sir, that's not our letter"

"Well you could have e-mailed me too.  What's the situation"

"You have to pay the duties and taxes and storage before we will release the shipment"

"Storage?"

"Yes sir.  Because you didn't pay your duties and taxes there are storage charges"

"But how am I supposed to pay them when I haven't been notified of them?"

"We did sir, we tried calling you and wrote to you"

"But I have received any calls or letters and now you want to charge me storage?"

"Yes sir"

"Can I just ask you, because I live in a freeport my understanding is I can import goods duty free?"

"Sir, all goods imported into the Philippines must pay duty and taxes"

"What?  Even in the freeports"

"Sir, all goods imported into the Philippines must pay duty and taxes"

"But you're not answering my question about the freeport"

"Sir, if you have a complaint, please write in"

"I'm not complaining, I'm asking you a question about the freeport"

"Sir, all goods imported into the Philippines must pay duty and taxes"

"But you're still not answering my question!"

"Sir, all goods imported into the Philippines must pay duty and taxes"

"Well how much is it?" (Exasperated)

"There are duties, taxes, storage and local charges"

"What do you mean 'local charges'"

"Sir, those will be the charges for delivering the goods to you address"

"But it's a courier door-to-door service"

If you give me your e-mail address, sir, I'll send you details"

"(sigh) Ok then, it's lostthewilltolivein@corruptcountry.com"

I did actually give them my real e-mail address but the one above reflects more how I feel.  A day later I receive an e-mail stating that I must pay Php7,220 for the release of the cargo and that other local charges will be determined upon delivery.

Php 7,220 equates to a whopping 152% of the value of the shipment.  And 'other local charges'????

So I replied asking for a breakdown of the Php7,220 and just precisely what the other local charges were likely to be.

I didn't get a reply.  So I re-sent the e-mail.  Not once but several time and not once did I receive a reply.

I wrote to Nespresso.  No reply.

I wrote to Fex Ex Switzerland.  No reply.

So take my advice: should you decide you buy a Nespresso coffee machine don't even consider bringing to the Philippines.  And furthermore, if you have a problem with your shipment, don't bother writing to either Nespresso or Fex Ex.

I guess that someone in authority here in the Philippines is now quietly enjoying a nice cup of Nespresso coffee.

Fex Ex used to have its centre of operations in Asia in Subic but moved it to China.  Is it any wonder why?